A Swish Way To Change Behaviour

Right, let’s do some playing around with our visual representations to change an unwanted behaviour…. At last….!

Of course this really should be premium content only available to those who subscribe to my e-zine: “Afternoon tea with Martin Wright”…. Just joking, Kevin!!

This technique is based on a “pattern” from neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) called the “Swish” pattern.

Start by choosing a minor unwanted state or behaviour that you have that has a particular trigger e.g. “Whenever my wife/husband looks at me in a particular way, I feel bad”, “Whenever I’m under pressure to answer a question, I bite my nails”, “Whenever I’m on a first date, I feel tongue-tied”. This technique won’t work (on it’s own) for addictions – including smoking – so choose something small to start with.

Now change using the following steps. I suggest you read it through to get the hang of what you need to do, and then do it without the script.

1. What’s the trigger?
   • When and where does this happen?
   • How do you know it’s time to … (eg. feel bad)?
   • What do you see, hear immediately before get the feeling you don’t want?
   • Now, when you think of that (State or Behaviour) do you have a picture?
   • If necessary, adjust that picture so that you’re looking at the scene not as an observer but through your own eyes
2. White-out the picture, and think what you going to have for tea tonight!
3. What do you want to feel/do instead?
   • What do you want? Not what you don’t want – What you want.
   • How would you like to feel/act instead?
   • What qualities, abilities, feelings will you have when you are the person for whom this is no longer a problem?
   • What will you be thinking about when you’re no longer thinking about the problem?
   • When you think of that (State or Behaviour) do you have a picture?
   • Make it bigger and brighter until you are feeling great!
   • Now step out of the picture so that you’re looking at the scene not through your own eyes but as an observer
4. Set up the change
   • Temporarily shrink the outcome picture until it is a little dot
   • Place the dot in the middle of the trigger picture and see it in the middle of the trigger picture
5. “SWISSSHHHH!”
   • Now move the trigger picture, with the dot in it, away from you
   • As it moves away notice that the trigger picture gets smaller and smaller and dimmer and dimmer until all you see is a little dot way way out on the horizon
   • Now notice that dot can begin to move toward you, slowly at first, then accelerating explosively
   • As it gets closer all you see is the picture of how you want to be getting bigger and brighter until all you see is you having achieved your outcome….. as quickly as…. SWISSSHHHH!
6. Repeat
   • Do this 5 times, with a break state in between (white-out the picture, and think of something else for a few moments)
   • See the trigger picture with the dot that represents your outcome…….Move it all away……… and………. SWISSSHHHH!
   • As you repeat you may notice how much faster your brain does this each time, the dot should be accelerating explosively towards you at least by the 3rd SWISSSHHHH!
7. Test and Future Pace
   • Now, try to get the old picture back and notice what happens
   • [If you can get it back, repeat until you can't!]
   • Think of an event in the future, an event which if it had happened in the past would have caused you to have had that old (Behaviour/State) and notice how it’s different now

Good luck! Let me know how you get on.

Martin

Photo credit – Angry

Photo credit – Happy